Communicating with referrers about upset patients

Even in the best practices, there are times when a patient becomes upset. Sometimes it’s because treatment is more complex than anticipated, leading to longer appointments, follow-ups, or additional costs. While many patients accept these changes, others may react strongly to the unexpected.

There are also factors outside our control that can trigger frustration. Patients may be unhappy with insurance limitations, unclear about the reason for referral, or simply overwhelmed by the stress of pain and treatment. Whatever the cause, emotions can run high.

When this happens, I make it a priority to connect directly with the referring doctor. My goal is to ensure they are never caught off guard by a patient’s negative experience. I explain the situation clearly and share what steps I am taking next—whether it’s placing a follow-up call to the patient, scheduling them for additional care, or simply offering reassurance.

The way this message is delivered matters. I always keep the tone calm, factual, and supportive. Blame has no place in these conversations—not toward our practice, the referring doctor, or the patient. Often what appears like difficult behavior in our office may simply be heightened anxiety; meanwhile, that same patient could be one of the referring doctor’s most trusted and loyal patients.

Open and professional communication is more than a courtesy—it’s a trust-building practice. By keeping referrers fully informed and demonstrating care for both their patients and their relationships, we strengthen confidence in our partnership. Patients may face surprises in their treatment journey, but our referring doctors should never be surprised by how we handle them.